All the Wonderful Smells of Late Night Porta-potty Escapades
No one questioned my motives, they just moved out of my way.
Imagine a porta-potty. Not a portable toilet for camping. Nor the little chemical toilets in a camper without a black water tank. I’m talking the portable restrooms in the blue, yellow, or green rectangular cuboid like structures. The ones made of plastic that contain a gray urinal and a toilet. The ones you can always count on seeing at an active construction site. Or in my case, at a concert.
Any large event with tons of people is almost guaranteed to have lines of portable restrooms. Rows of them, ready for anxious patrons needing to relieve themselves. Plastic doors on a spring hinge alerting the next person of its vacancy.
The smell is palpable. There’s a very distinct aroma that a porta potty gives off. The blue liquid inside is designed to hide your pile of shit while attempting to mask the odor and kill the bacteria at the same time. The problem is the shit begins to pile up the more and more people use it.
So, you walk into a porta potty and the smell of blue biocide, urine, feces and the occasional vomit is just too visceral. It’s kind of like describing a jar of pickles, your body has a response to where you salivate and pucker because you know what that pickle smells, taste, and feels like. If I did a good job describing the portable toilets to you, then you most definitely can smell it right now. Or at least imagine it.
I personally can’t stand using them. I’m not a fan of big crowds and fighting an unorganized line to use the restroom only to find it’s covered in urine from drunk misfires is never a pleasant experience. To take it even further, who takes a shit at a concert in a porta potty? Like seriously, use the bathroom before you go.
I digress in self-inflicted frustration.
This description of a porta-potty at a concert filled with thousands of people, brings me to the meat of the story.
It’s approximately 11:00 p.m. The current country musician is opening their first song at our local county fair that’s been going on all week. This year my son was exhibiting a market goat for show. We were staying in an RV nearby in the…