Becoming Dove
“Such a cringe, Mom,” my son scoffed, revealing his teenage disdain for my new car plates that read ‘I AM DOVE’. “But I AM Dove,” I replied. It’s more than just a name; it’s become my identity, something I’ve embraced wholeheartedly. He rolled his eyes, and we moved on to other topics.
Little does he realize how profound this name is for me, especially as I approach my 46th birthday on August 11th.
Embracing the Gayatri in me
Throughout my life, I’ve been known as Gayatri. A name that always seemed to carry the weight of expectations beyond my reach. “Gayatri” is synonymous with the Gayatri mantra, a prayer for the enlightenment of the mind, seeking divine blessings to dispel ignorance and darkness. It’s often interpreted as a plea for spiritual awakening and inner consciousness. Honestly, I wasn’t fond of my name for various reasons. It felt old-fashioned, out of touch with the modern, cool Indian names I desired. It wasn’t until I turned 40 that I truly grasped the depth and significance of my name, understanding why it was chosen for me. I began to realize that there was a purpose behind it, a purpose that started unfolding in my 40s.
Emerging as Dove
A memory resurfaced from my college graduation week, a conversation with my mother. She recalled how I cried for days after my graduation because I was the only one who didn't have plans to work or study further when everyone else in my graduating class did. Freshly crowned as a university topper, I felt invincible, with dreams of pursuing further studies and a career in business, even venturing to a big city. But those dreams shattered when my parents revealed their plans for my marriage before all else. Their promise was to find me a husband who’d respect and support my aspirations. I hail from a deeply conservative family, where women were (not any more) traditionally homemakers, not professionals. As dreams gave way to this reality, I felt crushed, like someone had shattered me into countless pieces. Was my worth solely tied to marriage? Was being in someone else’s shadow my destiny?
Amid my uncertainty, a program at the St. Agnes Special School in my hometown caught my attention. The Diploma in Special Ed program offered hands-on experience with children with disabilities. Those 18 months were transformative, revealing the depth of selfless service as I watched the school’s staff dedicate themselves to these children, many from low-income backgrounds. After completing the program, I got married and moved to the U.S., pursuing an MBA and a 20-year tech career. Despite my achievements, I battled unhappiness, feeling that my professional contributions lacked impact and purpose.
Little did I know that I was inching closer and closer to emerging as Dove with a path to purpose that would tie back to my work at the school in my hometown some 20 odd years ago!
A Path to Purpose
Through chance encounters and supportive individuals, I stumbled onto my life’s purpose. Life seemed to guide me towards opportunities, introducing me to people who helped bring my mission to life. The Accidental Ally was born on Mother’s Day in 2020, uniting my aspiration with every mother’s wish for their child. My company aims to empower individuals with cognitive disabilities, connecting them to fulfilling and engaging professional lives they are often told they couldn’t attain. My journey towards becoming Dove began with self-acceptance. I had to love and embrace myself before extending that love to others. This involved making peace with my past, my struggles, and my pain, shaping a brighter future for both me and those I aimed to serve.
I became Dove that day under the magnificent magnolia tree in the front yard of my home. I was named by beautiful people who looked at me and said, ‘You are Dove’. And I became Dove from that moment on.
The Essence of a Name
Ultimately, a name is a vessel for identity, but it’s the acceptance of oneself that truly matters. Whether Gayatri or Dove, what counts is embracing our authentic selves.
Rohan Bhupatiraju ignited this transformation in me. As a young man with Down syndrome, his vision for a brighter future inspired a mission towards helping individuals like him in finding meaningful careers. His words, “You have changed my life,” during a recent birthday celebration for me, resonated deeply. I’ve changed his life, and he’s changed mine in countless ways. It’s all part of a larger plan, to become the person I’m meant to be.
On most days, you’ll find me in a white tee and joggers, minimal makeup, and proudly sporting my gray hairs. I sit at my desk, the morning sun kissing my face through the window, overwhelmed by gratitude for a life filled with love and purposeful work. Whether Gayatri or Dove, I’m here to serve a divine purpose. While I once thought it was about serving others, I now realize the primary purpose is to love and appreciate myself, strengths and weaknesses alike.
In the grand tapestry of existence, we’re all here to be the best versions of ourselves.
Happy Birthday to me!
