Getting Through Pregnancy With Hope and Resilience

Lessons from a Covid preemie mom

Photo by kaushal mishra on Unsplash

You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice. — Bob Marley

I remember the day I excitedly held a light pink positive pregnancy test in my hand after months of trying. Butterflies in the stomach, hardly breathing, and yet eyes fixated on the strip for the longest waiting time in the world. Online reviews mentioned even the lightest second pink line meant positive.

My husband hid his excitement as he didn’t want me to get too enthusiastic and later get disappointed. I had in the meantime done the test 3–4 times to be sure. It was the same result every time. Then it was a matter of time, doing the test daily to see the second pink line get darker. And finally getting the doctor’s confirmation. It’s the first time I felt like a mom.

You can’t help feel responsible for the little human growing inside of you.

My first trimester was exciting. I read approximately 30 pregnancy books. Operating on high adrenaline is common in this phase. Prenatal yoga and nutrition became my daily endeavors. I tossed out plastics, read ingredients on items, and threw anything suspicious.

Some of these habits remained. Overall, this time was a breeze barring some light nausea, which wasn’t tough to overlook for me considering the bigger picture. The regular scans are tough to deal with; but they reassure you your baby is doing well.

Everyone says the second trimester is the easiest of the three trimesters. This wasn’t true for me. I had a serious complication discovered mid-pregnancy. I went for a routine 20-week scan after work, and they asked me to wait much longer than needed. Then the doctor came in with a nurse to break the news that my cervix was open and I could deliver any minute. I was appalled. Everything was completely fine until less than a month ago. How could it change suddenly?

This was the biggest shock of my life. The doctor wanted to admit me for surgery right away to improve the chances for my baby. However, I asked for time to discuss with my husband and come back the next morning. I wanted to think through this calmly with someone…