How to Become More
The pain of learning can tell us that we’re outgrowing our old shell
Dear C (age 5),
Can I share with you a dream that I sometimes have? It’s a good dream that helps me understand myself and the world a bit better, when things are changing. It’s not one of those dreams that feels like you’re being chased and makes you run in your sleep.
It’s one that feels so completely real that when you wake up, it takes you most of the day to work out that it’s not real. I have realized that this dream tends to come to me whenever I am being stretched and pushed in real life. I think my dream might be useful in helping me (and you) understand what happens to us when we go through difficult changes.
Describing a dream to someone else is tricky — a bit like describing a color — but let’s try. I’m going to try to give you just enough to understand the dream and its meaning, and then you might find you can fill in the details for yourself and create your own version. Sit somewhere quiet and comfortable, and take your time. Remember to notice what you’re feeling as we go.
Imagine you are standing somewhere in our house. You know it well — you’ve lived in it all your life—and it’s familiar, friendly, safe, well-lit, and warm. You’re alone but not lonely. It’s quiet but not eerie.