Humans 101
How to Never Break Up
My friendship failures taught me something important about marriage
I have a confession to make: I’m 24 years old and I’ve never had a breakup. I’ve never dated someone only to find out all the stars in their eyes were faded. I’ve never had a romantic relationship end in failure or loss or tears. I’ve never had the nostalgic pangs of “having been in love with someone.”
It’s not because I’m new to romance. I’ve watched my friends struggle with dating, swipe endlessly right, and get their hearts broken. I’ve seen them get engaged, and I’ve seen them at the brink of divorce. I’m always the eager shoulder, comfortable with the wetness of silent tears. And I myself have been married for two years—one of the lucky few to have achieved this status without the dark side of romantic love.
Today, I’m still with my husband, the only person I’ve ever seriously dated or even kissed. There’s a freshness and a resilience to my marriage that hasn’t been there with my other relationships — a bond comparable only to that with my sister. The past years have come with ugly fights but there’s a certainty to knowing you’re not going to be walked out on or that you’re not going to walk. Above all that’s what not having a breakup has taught me — it is possible to just decide not to.
