Dispelling 7 Persistent Myths About Marriage
Strong relationships aren’t about compromise or never going to bed angry
Somewhere around our 18th wedding anniversary, I noticed that my husband and I had lost the spark that first brought us together. Our busy family life and the demands of his career took priority even though our marriage screamed for attention. To an outsider, things may have looked pretty solid. We belonged to a vibrant church with a caring small group and lots of friends in our life. But we ignored the subtle yet obvious signs that our marriage was no longer thriving. We took each other for granted and assumed life would eventually slow down enough to (finally) have time to focus on us.
We both had enormous unspoken expectations of each other, and we were in fault-finding mode most of the time. There was a lot we didn’t like about each other, even though we still loved each other as much as ever. Both of us were sure that our marriage would be better if only the other one was willing change.
One day, we were fighting about something I don’t remember, but I won’t forget the vein popping out of my normally laid-back husband’s neck as he accused me of being “the most un-self-aware person he had ever met.” I tossed my hair back and said, “Thank you.” I knew he wasn’t paying me a compliment, but I…
