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I Got Kicked Out of My ‘Mommy and Me’ Class
And it was the first time I believed something might be wrong
When I was three months pregnant with my second child, I moved from New York City to Los Angeles. I had a three-year-old daughter and was preparing for “siblings,” and everywhere I went in my new community, I heard moms parroting the wisdom of a mysterious child-wrangling guru named Marla.
They would say, “Marla says to take away the pacifier by two,” and “Marla says the older sibling needs a special job with the baby,” and “Marla says never to use food as a reward.” I wondered, Who is this sage-like Marla?
Marla turned out to be a veteran “Mommy and Me” facilitator whose class took place in a wooded valley with a creek, mini petting zoo, and tree-lined playground. Apparently, Marla was a genius with siblings, and I was thrilled about the idea of doing Mommy and Me classes with my second child. Her class was always full with a waiting list so I called from the hospital the day after my delivery. I felt lucky to snag a spot for my newborn son and myself — even if it didn’t start for over a year.
Eighteen months later, Boy and I arrived for our first Mommy and Me class at the little cottage in the woods. Marla’s reputation promised a warm demeanor and grandma-like wisdom. But after a few weeks, I could tell Marla didn’t like me. She didn’t smile at me or talk to me or ask how things were going. I couldn’t figure out why.
“I think Marla hates me,” I told my husband one morning while squeezing into a pair of maternity jeans. “You’re nuts,” he said, patting me on the belly. “You’re imagining it.” But I didn’t think so.
I watched Becky cry about the impact of baby number two on her marriage, big, blotchy tears rolling down her cheeks into Marla’s waiting Kleenex. Rachel got a shoulder rub every Monday over the 20 pounds she couldn’t lose. I had troubles, too. I was already pregnant again with number three, and a week earlier, my oldest had stuck a stuffed elephant on top of her brother’s sleeping face. Was this an early sign of sibling rivalry? I hoped Marla could figure it out.
The next class, I arrived early. No one was there yet. Boy toddled up to the Play-Doh area. Marla walked around filling up…
