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I Walked Out of Al-Anon and Never Went Back
For those of us who love addicts, cold turkey is the only withdrawal method that works
“God grant me the serenity…”
I was failing before the first line was over. I had zero interest in serenity—I wanted solutions.
By the time I walked into that church basement, I was desperate. My partner couldn’t quit drinking or wouldn’t quit drinking. I’m still not sure but maybe the important part is that he had no interest in quitting drinking. It took me far too many years to accept this.
Our lives were unraveling. I was unraveling. For the first time in my adult life — and I recognize how obnoxious this sounds — I found myself in a situation I couldn’t figure out on my own. I assumed these Al-Anon people could help me solve it.
It turns out that’s not what they do. Nor do they claim to. It says right on their website that sobriety is not the goal. So I’m not blaming Al-Anon, I just misunderstood what it was all about. Al-Anon is a support group and I wanted a think tank. I’ve always been more oriented toward fixing than coping. It’s probably a character flaw.
The goal of Al-Anon is to help people find their own happiness in a way that is separate from and not dependent upon whether their loved…
