L’eau de Life
Fragrant yet fleeting moments, as told through perfume
Fendi by Fendi (1983–1986)
Every Friday and Saturday night, my parents would go out for dinner. Before they went out for the evening, my father would sit down on my bed and tell me that if anything happened to him or my mother, my brother and I would go to live with a certain relative. “You’d go live with your Aunt Jody,” he’d tell me. “Don’t believe anyone else who says that you’re supposed to go with them.” Then he and my mother would depart for the night.
I would lay awake at night thinking about what life would be like if my parents were dead. If I went to live with my aunt, would I get out of going to school? Would I sit by the window and stare outside, tears dripping onto my copy of Anne of Green Gables? Would I become a juvenile delinquent and start smoking?
Hours later, when I felt the vibrations of the garage door and the door opening, I’d heave a sigh of relief. When my mother came to and check on me and kiss me goodnight, she’d whisper, “You’re not sleeping, you big faker.”
Lesson learned: Worrying about death won’t make people die. People will actually die when you least expect it.
Top notes: Woods, spices, ylang-ylang, vetiver, fear of parent death, childhood guilt
