My Boyfriend’s Amazon Addiction Keeps Me Up At Night
How I forgave my boyfriend’s secret, annoying hobby
I open my eyes. It’s dark. It feels late. I turn to look at the clock, then remember there’s no electricity because of a scheduled power outage I’ve known about all week. I was afraid that once the power went out, I would be deprived of heat. It’s an irrational fear, as our house is heated by a wood stove. The heat it puts out is substantial. During the last power outage, my boyfriend, Mr. K, and I sat half-dressed in the living room in sweltering indoor heat, playing cards by candlelight.
Even though it’s late, I feel alert and restless. My mind fills with thoughts. I think about my relationship. Mr. K’s pervasive flaws come flying into my mind like bats fleeing a cave. I try to ignore them.
I’m terribly uncomfortable and need to move. I wonder if Mr. K knows I’m awake. He seems to be asleep. He is snoring. I move. He tosses a hot, skinny arm around my agitated body. He coos something loving into my ear. While I lay awake, desperate and anxious, he sleeps loudly. He alternates between tossing his sweaty arms around me, squeezing me suffocatingly close, murmuring sweet nothings, and snoring.
I think about his bad teeth. His foolishness. His addictions. His ignorance. His immaturity. I concoct a…
