My Parents Don’t Know Me Anymore
Maintaining a relationship is hard when you’re the only one trying
A thumbs up emoji and “Good” followed by a smiley face. Those are the responses I received from my mom and dad, respectively, via text yesterday when I inquired about how they were doing and what they’ve been up to. My parents, both in their mid-seventies, are divorced and live by themselves.
Although they are in moderately good health, I am painfully — if not eerily — aware that they could tumble down their stairs and no one would know. So, I’ve taken it upon myself to call and check in on them. I’m not merely performing my perfunctory obligation as their only child. I genuinely care about them and their wellbeing.
And I’ve become increasingly aware of something:
My parents’ replies are, by and large, entirely devoid of emotion and almost AI-generated in nature.
After decades of being raised in their presence, I know that what my parents don’t say is every bit as important as what they do. They don’t ask how I am in return; nor do they care to know how their two (and only) grandkids are.
There’s no connection and zero interest. Yet, if you were to ask my parents if they love me, I bet you dollars to donuts that they’d say yes. And I do believe they…
