Member-only story
LIVED THROUGH THIS
Reflections on 20 Years of War
A veteran’s musings on leaving Afghanistan and the killing fields
I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation. War is hell. — William Tecumseh Sherman
“Do you still think about war?”
I let my finger hover over the keyboard after I fire off the text message. I expect the responses might be slow or nonexistent, but a green bubble appears.
“I swore I would never be this person, and yet, I think about it every day,” my old teammate remarks.
I sigh relief, knowing it’s not just me. Though it’s been 14 years since Iraq and 17 since Afghanistan, I catch myself thinking about war every day.
It probably sounds odd to dwell frequently on an experience that happened so long ago. I imagine it’s reminiscent of the guy who reflects on his glory days playing high school football. Granted, that guy wasn’t running around on the field while people tried to kill him. Nor did he face the moral quagmires the coach and referees kept putting into play. And when the “game” ends for soldiers, we can’t just leave it all out on the…
