This Is Us

Stop Worrying About Virginity

Rigid definitions of sex distracted me from enjoying my experiences

Photo: Enrico Figlia/Getty Images

“If you don’t have sex by your 21st birthday, let us know.”

I had no idea how to respond to the offer. Was it a kindness? A joke at my expense? I barely knew these women from the dorm, but everyone knew about my “problem.” I was 20…