The Rollercoaster of Being Seen

The most underrated gift of partnership and the risk that follows

Emily J. Smith
Human Parts

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Photo by Caleb Woods on Unsplash

Every so often I have a unique thought. I become proud of this thought and desperate to share it with someone — anyone — so they can bear witness to what I perceive as my own distinct genius. But it reads as a little desperate to text a friend something that I know will feel ridiculous in about eighteen minutes just to score a validating Haha or a heart emoji.

This was what Twitter was for! (RIP; Threads — though we all hoped for the best — is no replacement).

There are other moments when I’m suddenly in the in the ideal version of my life, everything around me, no matter how mundane, inexplicably gorgeous, oddly in its place and I need someone — anyone — to see that this is, in fact, my actual life (at least for a fleeting second), because I’m not always capable of trusting that my experience was good and valid if someone else has not seen it and deemed it as such.

This is what Instagram is for!

(I’m too old to know what TikTok is for.)

The desire to be witnessed is natural and human and addicting, and social media companies know this and exploit this fabulously. It feels good to be seen without having to put that burden on any one recipient, but of…

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Emily J. Smith
Human Parts

Writer and tech professional. My debut novel, NOTHING SERIOUS, is out Feb '25 from William Morrow / HarperCollins (more at emjsmith.com).