Why I’ve Been Avoiding Creativity
A lesson on vulnerability, self-compassion, and the inner child
I’m a chronic procrastinator. When faced with a challenging task, I often put it on the back burner in favor of something easier. On the surface it feels like laziness or a lack of self-control, but in reality it’s a lot more than that. Procrastination is driven by feelings of insecurity and doubt associated with the tasks we turn ourselves away from. The longer we delay completing these tasks, the more our anxiety feeds on itself, allowing our internal critics to make their presence known with disapproval and nagging feelings of inadequacy.
Recently, I’ve been doing anything I can to avoid writing. I’ve subconsciously convinced myself that writing doesn’t matter and the self-judgement stifles me. It’s a clear indication that I’ve been refusing to write because I’m afraid of being vulnerable. And yet, pursuing the uncomfortable and unfamiliar often leads to empowerment and liberation. Creating art is a vulnerable yet essential part of life. I’ve never written down these words in this exact order. If I pick up a pen, I can draw something I’ve never drawn before. To deny vulnerability is to deny everything it means to be human.
In Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World, author David Epstein eloquently describes how…
