Dear Women: Men Don’t Need Your ‘Permission’ to Cry
Our emotions may not manifest like yours — and that’s okay
“It’s okay to cry,” my wife told me as we drove home from my father’s funeral. My mother told me the same thing during the funeral. Both of them told me the same thing two years earlier at my sister’s funeral. They said it again three years later at my grandmother’s funeral.
“I know,” I said each time, secretly wishing I could let out a few tears just so they’d know I was, in fact, sad. But I can’t cry on demand.
Years earlier, as I said goodbye to my out-of-town guests the day after my wedding, my mother told me she thought she’d seen me cry as I watched my bride walk down the aisle. My mom thought that was sweet.
“Your father cried tears of joy when he saw me coming down the aisle on our wedding day, too. You’re just like your father,” she said.
I didn’t have the heart to tell her that any tears she may have noticed were there because the sun was in my eyes.
I know my wife and mother are just trying to be supportive, but I’m a fully grown man. I don’t need anyone’s permission to cry. If I feel the need to cry, I will. My lack of tears during emotional times isn’t intentional. I’m not trying to be emotionally unavailable. I’m not…
