Personal Essay

Wrestling With Forbidden Attraction

I had spoken in depth with each of my siblings, but with him there had been an extremely strong connection born of similar experiences

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Human Parts
Published in
7 min readDec 29, 2023

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A similar looking guy and girl laughing in a bar
Photo by Himanshu Choudhary on Unsplash

I have never been particularly fond of my birthday. It’s in the spring, which is great as it makes you think of new beginnings, but for me, it is also accompanied by conflicting emotions. Don’t get me wrong, I lapped it up as a child. However, once past my teen years, I couldn’t help but wonder what it would have been like to celebrate the occasion with my birth family.

That is something I didn’t get to find out even after finally meeting them, as the experience totally overwhelmed me. Particularly when I realised I was actually falling for one of my half-brothers. Yes, you read correctly, and please spend a little time reading my story rather than entering your glass house to throw stones. It is not my proudest moment, but on rare occasions during a life, attraction can seem inevitable. This was one of those times.

I was adopted in 1968 when I was six months old, so grew up without knowing any blood relatives — never looking into eyes which resembled my own. The first time I held my new born baby, I knew I had no choice. I needed to find our roots.

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May More
Human Parts

Freelance Writer/Editor (Flash Fiction / Personal Essay) 💜 Adoptee / Proud Mum / Like growing things, coffee & hens