Human Parts
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Human Parts

This Is Us

Lessons in Couple Privilege and Nonmonogamy

Thinking you can choose how a relationship will evolve has risks.

A masculine person sitting behind and resting their head on the shoulder of another masculine person.
Photo: PhotoAlto/PhotoAlto Agency RF Collections/Getty Images

Since I prefer to date other nonmonogamous people, the question “How long have you and your partner been polyamorous?” comes up fairly early in conversations. It’s more than just curiosity. I consider it a litmus test, a sizing up, because…




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Louie Murray

Louie Murray

Sometimes I think so hard words fall out my hands and here we are. Life’s short, stay soft, eat cake and roller skate.

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