Humans 101
Staying Sane Is a Practice
We won’t be the same, but we’ll get through this
So when you call up that shrink in Beverly Hills
You know the one, Dr. Everything’ll Be Alright
Instead of asking him how much of your time is left
Ask him how much of your mind, baby
— “Let’s Go Crazy” by Prince
In a very basic nutshell, the theory of shattered assumptions says that people operate according to a conceptual system based on a set of assumptions about the world, the self, and others. These personally held assumptions about how the world works, help you make sense of the world and your role within it. They also help you to feel safe, capable, and in control of what happens to you and, in some ways, those around you. Psychologists refer to our basic assumptions as the “assumptive world” and believe that when extreme events challenge this assumptive world significant distress and disruption can occur.
— Death, Grief, and Shattered Assumptions by What’s Your Grief
Finding out that your spouse is unfaithful is a pretty extreme event. Even traumatic. Depending on how you find out, it can be more or less traumatic.
