On queerness and symmetry

What quitting makeup taught me about femininity, people pleasing, and beauty

I’m not sure what’s scarier: losing touch with my friends who become parents, or becoming one myself

Anger is the armor that helps me survive in a world that doesn’t understand me

All the ‘suspicious’ people my neighbors warn each other about have one thing in common: They look like me

Shortly after filmmaker Agnès Varda died, I went to Paris to learn from her life — and take a piece of it home with me

They believe my worth is in the eyes of other men. I believe it’s in myself.

My extra-long locks were a symbol of ownership and dominance, which is why I chopped my tailbone-touching mane

A disappointment is simply an opportunity for growth

When I switch between languages, my values and demeanor shift too

At 19, I was almost raped. For far too long I thought it was my fault.

And it was the first time I believed something might be wrong

On peer pressure, late-life motherhood, and why I won’t be having a baby in my forties

On love, obligation, and making sense of what it means to be adopted

As a little girl, I changed who I was to fit in. Decades later, am I still pretending?

Four fears that compel us to have kids — and why I’ve chosen a different path

In a culture where beauty standards are clearly defined, how do you make peace with falling short?

Having two babies at very different times in my life has shown me firsthand how racism and poverty affect new parents

In the ’80s, there were fewer happy endings for misfits like me

How a simple swimsuit helped me embrace my sexuality

When it comes to identity, the best we can do is ask questions

It took me 12 years to realize I’m worth celebrating — even if my birthday’s not

All I wanted was a less-awkward Lyft ride. What I got was a lesson in hate, fear, and — most importantly — love.

For years I watched a honeysuckle bush grow wild. Then, one day, it was gone.